Merry Christmas, ya filthy animal! – Home Alone
Santa! Oh my God! Santa’s coming! I know him! I know him! – Elf
It’s not the size of the gift that counts, but the size of the heart that gives it. – How the Grinch Stole Christmas
The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear. – Elf
First, we’ll make snow angels for two hours, and then we’ll go ice skating, and then we’ll eat a whole roll of Toll House cookie dough as fast as we can, and then to finish, we’ll snuggle. – Elf
Seeing isn’t believing; believing is seeing. – The Santa Clause
I never thought it was such a bad little tree. It’s not bad at all, really. Maybe it just needs a little love. – A Charlie Brown Christmas
Buddy the Elf, what’s your favorite color? – Elf
I don’t want a lot for Christmas, there’s just one thing I need… – Mariah Carey, All I Want for Christmas Is You
Looks like somebody needs to sing a Christmas carol. – Jim Carrey, How the Grinch Stole Christmas
I don’t mind getting coal for Christmas, I can just use it to fuel my sarcasm.
The only present I want for Christmas is a box that will magically wrap itself.
Who needs mistletoe when you have good-looking relatives?
I tried to be good this year, but I got bored.
Christmas calories don’t count, right?
I love Christmas cookies so much, I can’t even think straight!
If Santa looked like Brad Pitt, I would stay up all night waiting for him.
I’m dreaming of a white Christmas, but if the white runs out, I’ll drink the red.
Christmas is like candy; it slowly melts in your mouth, sweetening every moment.
Christmas is the time of year when everyone gets older and starts asking for practical gifts.
The best thing about Christmas is the office holiday party. It’s the one time of year when you can embarrass yourself in front of your boss and coworkers and it’s totally socially acceptable.
Don’t be a Grinch, enjoy the Christmas rush!
If you can’t handle me at my Christmas sweater, you don’t deserve me at my New Year’s Eve party dress.
I don’t need mistletoe to kiss you. I’ll just use the Christmas spirit.
The best part of Christmas is the awkward family photos.
I put Santa on my wish list, but all I got was a restraining order.
Christmas is like a snowflake; it’s beautiful, but it can also be a little cold and prickly.
Santa Claus has the perfect job. He works one day a year, gets cookies and milk, and all he has to do is travel the world delivering presents. Sign me up for that gig!
Santa Claus is the ultimate hipster. He’s been rockin’ the beard and flannel for centuries.
Who needs elves when you have Amazon Prime?
Dear Santa, define ‘naughty.’
The Grinch stole Christmas, but let’s be real, Santa stole the show.
Christmas sweaters are just outdoor pajamas.
Christmas cheer is best served with a side of sarcasm.
If I don’t see at least one person dressed as Santa, I’m going back to bed.
The best kind of present is the one you didn’t have to buy yourself.
If Christmas cookies were a currency, I would definitely be rich.
I don’t need mistletoe to get kissed. I’ll just use my charming personality.
Christmas lights do a great job of hiding my messy house.
The only thing better than opening presents is opening the fridge for leftovers.
Christmas is like a snowflake; it’s beautiful, but if you hold onto it for too long, it melts and turns into a big mess.
Santa Claus wears red, but everyone knows the real power color is black.
Instead of presents, can I just get a nap for Christmas?
Are you a Christmas tree? Because I want to put my star on top of you.
My favorite kind of Christmas wreath is the one that combines pinecones and sarcasm.
I’m dreaming of a white Christmas, but if the white runs out, I’ll drink the red.
If you think I’m a Christmas nut, you should see my tree.
I’m not a Grinch, I’m just like Santa – I only work one day a year.
Snowmen are the only creatures that get to wear a three-piece suit and still look cool.
Christmas is the only time of year when you can deck the halls, get lit, and still be socially acceptable.
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