Funny Exercise Quotes to Get Your Abs Laughing

I exercise because I love the feeling of making my muscles cry and my heart scream ‘What have you done?’

I swear my body tries to exercise its right to remain stationary.

Yoga? More like bowelga, because my downward dog always ends in an upward mess.

I don’t jog, I run late.

Exercise is my favorite excuse to wear spandex and not be judged.

I believe in the power of cardio, but I also believe in the power of napping.

Exercise: the fine art of turning cupcakes into guilt-free pleasures.

I run because it’s the only way to get away from my problems… temporarily.

I can do a hundred sit-ups. Just not all at once.

I would do yoga every day if it didn’t require getting off the couch.

A gym membership: the best way to make my wallet sweat.

Sometimes I exercise so I can eat cake, and other times I eat cake so I have the energy to exercise.

I don’t sweat, I sparkle.

Running away from my problems counts as cardio, right?

Can I consider lifting a glass to my mouth as an arm exercise?

Burpees: the sound my motivation makes when it hits rock bottom.

I tried exercising early in the morning, but I soon realized my bed does more cardio than I do.

Exercise is just nature’s way of punishing us for sitting too much.

Yoga is my favorite way to pretend I’m a pretzel.

Exercise is a great way to distract yourself from the fact that you’re still single.

Funny Exercise Quotes to Get Your Abs Laughing part 2

I don’t sweat, I’m just percolating.

I’m not a gym rat, I’m more like a gym cat. I show up, stretch, and then find a cozy spot to nap in.

I don’t need a personal trainer, I need a personal motivator with a piece of chocolate cake.

My fitness goal is to get to the fridge without losing my breath.

Exercising is like dealing with a spider in the house – I’ll do it if I must, but I’ll complain about it the entire time.

I exercise so I can eat without judgment. Or pants.

I don’t always exercise, but when I do, I make sure to document it on Instagram for maximum accountability.

Who needs a gym when you can get a full-body workout just by trying to put on skinny jeans?

Can’t find the motivation to exercise? Just imagine yourself running away from a horde of zombies.

I lift weights so that I can carry all of my shopping bags in one trip.

Exercise is a great way to make you feel strong and empowered, until you try and open a jar of pickles.

Running: because punching people is frowned upon.

If sidewalks were made of chocolate, I’d exercise every day.

They say exercise gives you endorphins, but I’m still searching for the Doritos instead.

Exercising is like going to the dentist – you dread it, but you know it’s good for you.

I tried doing a push-up once. Then I realized I’d rather push up the remote control.

Exercise helps me maintain my sanity in this crazy world. Or is it making me go crazy? I can’t remember anymore.

I may not be able to run a marathon, but I can marathon-watch Netflix like a champ.

The only thing more painful than exercise is explaining why you started exercising in the first place.

I put the ‘flex’ in ‘reflexes’ – when someone throws a donut at me, I never miss.

Exercise is like a good joke – it’s much easier to appreciate when it’s done by someone else.

I don’t do burpees, I do ‘nerpees’ – the workout where you nerd out on the couch instead.

I bought a treadmill, but it just turned into a clothes hanger. So, technically, it’s still supporting my fitness journey.

My workout routine? Taking off my sports bra after attempting to exercise.

Just remember, the only bad workout is the one you didn’t do. But also, the one you did do and regretted immediately after.