Funny Sales Quotes to Brighten Your Day

The only time salesmen smile is when they count their commission.

If sales were easy, they would make it a sport.

Don’t worry if someone tells you no, it’s just another opportunity to find someone who will say yes.

Sales is like a rollercoaster ride – full of ups and downs, but always exhilarating.

In sales, it’s not about being the best, it’s about being better than yesterday.

If at first you don’t succeed, call it a launch and try again.

Sales is all about perseverance, patience, and a good sense of humor. Mostly humor.

There are three types of people in this world: those who make sales happen, those who watch sales happen, and those who wonder what happened.

When life gives you lemons, make sales pitches and sell lemonade.

In sales, they say luck is when preparation meets opportunity. I say it’s when you make your own luck and close the deal.

Salespeople are like superheroes – they have the power to turn a ‘no’ into a ‘yes’ and a prospect into a customer.

The secret to sales success? Honey, coffee, and a positive attitude.

When in doubt, close them out.

Never give up on a sale, or a dessert.

A good salesperson knows how to sell a product, a great salesperson knows how to sell the dream.

Sales is like dating – you have to know when to make your move and when to back off.

In sales, rejection is just redirection to the next opportunity.

Funny Sales Quotes to Brighten Your Day part 2

The best salespeople can sell ice to an Eskimo, but the smartest salespeople know not to.

Sales is like a marathon, except you’re running after customers instead of a finish line.

There’s no elevator to success in sales, you have to take the stairs, make the calls, and close the deals.

The difference between a good salesperson and a great one? A great one can sell snow to a snowman.

Sales is all about building relationships and making connections – just like a game of ‘six degrees of separation’.

If sales were easy, everyone would be doing it. And yet, here we are.

In sales, you have to be the shark – always moving forward, always hungry, and never looking back.

Sales is like being a detective – you have to ask the right questions, follow the clues, and close the case.

The secret to successful sales? Smiling, nodding, and pretending to listen.

Salespeople are the artists of persuasion – each pitch is a masterpiece waiting to be sold.

In sales, feedback is a gift. Just make sure it comes with a receipt so you can return it if you don’t like it.

Sales is like a puzzle, you have to find the missing piece – the customer’s needs – to complete the picture.

The true measure of a salesperson’s success is not how many sales they make, but how many lives they change.

Sales is like a game of chess – you have to think several moves ahead and anticipate your opponent’s moves.

In sales, the early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

To be a great salesperson, you have to listen twice as much as you talk. But when you talk, make it count.

Sales is like a poker game – you have to know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em, and know when to ask for a better hand.

Salespeople are like scientists – they experiment with different strategies and formulas until they find the one that works.

In sales, confidence is key. But if you can’t find the key, just break down the door.

If sales were easy, they wouldn’t call it a challenge.

Good salespeople sell products, great salespeople sell solutions.

Sales is like a dance – you have to be in tune with your partner, anticipate their moves, and lead them to the right steps.

If dogs could sell, they would be the best salespeople – they have mastered the art of wagging their tails.

The best salespeople are like chameleons – they can adapt to any situation and blend in with their customers.

In sales, confidence is everything. If you don’t have it, fake it until you make it – or until you get caught.

Sales is like a game of baseball – you have to know the rules, swing for the fences, and never be afraid to steal a base.

The secret to sales success? Smile, nod, and remember to send a thank you note with every pitch.

Sales is like a marathon, except you’re not running, you’re sprinting – and the finish line is a closed deal.

In sales, rejection is just a part of the process. So is coffee and an afternoon nap.

Good salespeople are like detectives – they uncover the customer’s pain points and offer them the perfect solution.

Sales is like a puzzle – you have to assemble the pieces and make the customer see the big picture.

If sales were easy, salesmen wouldn’t need pockets – because they would have nowhere to put all their money.

The secret to sales success? Practice, persistence, and a little bit of magic.