No Trespassing: Unicorns Only
No Trespassing: Unicorns Only
Wanted: Dead End Job
If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate
Warning: Adults Only – Sense of Humor Required
This board is gluten-free, because words don’t have calories
I can’t adult today, please don’t make me
Sorry, we’re open: Proceed with caution
Forget the cat, curiosity is what killed the human
Keep calm and act like you know what you’re doing
If sarcasm burned calories, I’d be a supermodel
Pickles are cucumbers soaked in magic
Apologies, our sense of humor may cause spontaneous laughter
The shortest horror story ever: ‘Wi-Fi Signal Lost’
No parking: Violators will be kissed by a llama
The snooze button is my best friend
Don’t grow up, it’s a trap
Warning: Excessive laughter may cause abs to appear
People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day
Due to price increase, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off
Not all who wander are lost, some are just avoiding responsibilities
Chocolate doesn’t ask questions, it understands
I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing
Reality called, so I hung up
Exercise? I thought you said ‘extra fries’
Hakuna Matata: It means no worries, until Monday morning
My dream job is not having one
Please excuse the mess, we live here
Keep calm and pretend it’s on the lesson plan
You had me at ‘hello’, but lost me at ‘mandatory meeting’
I can’t adult today, tomorrow doesn’t look good either
Life is short, smile while you still have teeth
I’m not lazy, I’m on energy-saving mode
Warning: Random bursts of dancing may occur
Today’s forecast: Procrastination with a chance of Netflix
Sometimes, the best therapy is a long drive and blasting music
My blood type is coffee
I’m not a control freak, but can I show you the right way to do that?
Keep calm and pretend it’s on the syllabus
That awkward moment when Netflix asks if you’re still watching
If you can read this, please bring coffee
I’m not a morning person, I’m a ‘I need five cups of coffee person’
Diet tip: Your pants won’t get tight if you don’t wear any
I’m not weird, I’m just limited edition
Excuse me, but may I interest you in not talking to me?
I’m always late, but worth the wait
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